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My Boyfriend’s Son Scares Our 3 Month-Old-Daughter on Purpose, Forcing Me to Take Action


In a calm suburban home, a dedicated mother faced a sad decision as her boyfriend’s 12-year-old son continued to intentionally frighten their three-month little daughter. Despite genuine appeals and warnings, the disturbing behavior continued, pushing the mother to the breaking point.

On January 11, 2024, an anonymous female contributor shared her unpleasant experience on the “AITAH” subreddit. After being diagnosed with postpartum depression (PPD), she questioned its impact on her behavior.

The Original Poster (OP) was in a six-year relationship with her partner. He also had a 12-year-old son, Jake, who had been living with OP for the past two years. OP, who had owned her home for over a decade, was dealing with a difficult issue regarding Jake’s behavior toward their three-month-old kid.


Despite Jake’s clear affection for his sister, an unpleasant trend emerged when he deliberately scared the infant. Jake would approach the baby, say, “RA!” and chuckle at her startled reaction. His laughter would be followed by a phony apology, claiming that he did not mean to terrify her.

This alarming rhythm persisted at least four times every day, prompting OP to seek assistance from the internet community, torn between her anxieties, the potential impact of PPD, and her need for a solution.


Despite OP’s continual efforts to halt Jake’s unsettling conduct, including warning him about the infant’s probable hearing damage and emphasizing the absence of amusement in his actions, the worrying behavior persisted.

The breaking point came three days ago when OP confronted her boyfriend and Jake out of exasperation. She issued a stark ultimatum, stating that any such intentional scares would result in eviction, effectively eliminating them from her life.

The boyfriend’s contradictory reactions drove the decision to take such extreme steps. While he occasionally intervened, he dismissed the OP’s worries as overreactions. Jake attempted to justify his actions by claiming that experiencing delight in a baby’s startle reflex was a common childhood experience.

OP, grappling with the weight of her ultimatum, vividly remembered the episode, adding, “If he purposefully scared my kid again, then [Jake and OP’s boyfriend] would be evicted.” Despite the harsh admonition, she felt a pang of sadness as Jake returned to his room, his face depressed.

A night before presenting her story, OP sneaked out of the room for a moment, leaving her three-month-old baby swinging sweetly. Jake took advantage of her brief absence to participate in yet another disturbing event. From a distance, OP overheard Jake ask in a childish voice, “What are you doing?” The aftermath was immediate: her daughter’s cry filled the air. She dashed back, only to hear her boyfriend interfere and attempt to settle the situation.

Jake, realizing the gravity of the situation, attempted to apologize, attributing his actions to a habit. The boyfriend, on the other hand, disagreed and minimized the gravity of the situation. Unyielding, OP dismissed their arguments and insisted they go. In contrast, her partner persisted in staying and refused to leave the house.

Faced with this impasse, OP resolved to depart and have the authorities serve an eviction notice. Despite her boyfriend’s protestations and claims that Jake is only 12 years old and cannot be perfect, she left and took decisive action the next day, filed for eviction. OP had previously attempted to understand Jake’s intentions for scaring her child by interrogating him about his behavior. “[He] thinks it’s funny when kids cry,” OP explained after their conversation. Still, part of her wondered if she had done the right thing. “AITA for kicking my BF and his kid out because his son was constantly scaring my baby on purpose?” I questioned the OP.

The OP’s story spread over the internet, eliciting widespread interest and sympathy from the online community. The majority of people are supportive, with many believing she made the correct decision.

“NTA. Yes. He’s 12. Old enough to know better and avoid doing it. Old enough to follow instructions. Would he appreciate it if you startled him every morning? No. “He’s 12, but he’s being an AH, which sounds almost sadistic,” one user commented.

“As a mother of a 12-year-old, I entirely understand that this is unusual for her age. Perhaps if he were five or six, but not twelve. They learn after being correct once or twice. He professes to like making newborns cry, which is disturbing. “I’m wondering what other behavioral issues he has,” stated another person.

“As the mother of a 4-year-old, this [behavior] would only be understandable if Jake was 2 or 3 years old,” said another netizen. “Let your boyfriend fall asleep, then clang a couple of pans together to wake him up.” Do this about four times per night and see if it alters his opinion. His child is 12. He is old enough to observe the rules. “This is more than just a kid being a kid,” said another reviewer.

Do you support OP’s stance, or do you feel she should have handled the situation differently? What approach would you take if you were in her place?