I wish that weren’t the case, but the world is full of toxic, negative people. They may also be completely exhausting. Think of your cruel, unforgiving father who is never compassionate, your cynical social media friend, or your partner who simply cannot enjoy your accomplishments. These people are total energy vampires who need to be dealt with and, if necessary, removed from your life.
Naturally, the final say on whether or not to put someone out to pasture belongs to you. Each person has a distinct threshold for negativity and a varied definition of what negativity entails. A remark may strike one person as wonderfully caustic while striking another person as a total gut punch.
Before we continue, let’s clarify what, in general, constitutes a bad person. According to Chinh Pham on the website PickTheBrain.com, this is “[someone] who complains and dumps their problems on you but doesn’t do anything to change their situation.” a person who lacks encouragement. Someone who makes you feel bad about yourself. Someone who casts doubt on your audacious (and possibly dangerous) decisions, lofty goals, or clever concepts. That may not agree with you, but I believe it to be rather accurate.
Here are some strategies for removing this kind of person and all of their baggage from your life if you’re sick of dealing with them.
1. Directly Up Inform them that they are being unkind.
Pessimists occasionally don’t realize how terrible they are making other people feel. They gradually lose the ability to communicate without delivering a sarcastic comment because they have developed a habit of negativity and pessimism. If that’s the case, gently inform them that you find them to be tough to be around. It might be all you need to keep them in your life and not have to put up with their complaining ways.
2. Engage with them in open conversation.
If their negativity problem is really that bad—that is, worse than the occasional irritating Facebook tirade—you might want to sit them down for a talk. Having an honest conversation with parents or long-term abusive partners who have destroyed your life may be crucial. Just remember to do it somewhere that will be seen. According to TheArtOfCharm.com, toxic people frequently experience irrationality or even violent outbursts. Speaking with them in public will significantly lessen the chance that this will occur. If problems occur, all you have to do is get up and leave.
3. Put a social media block on them
As a result, you have exposed their negativity, yet nothing appears to have changed. Maybe it’s time to start making sure that Negative Nancies never show up in your feeds again. You may not be able to physically disable your mother or best friend, but you may turn off their notifications. Alternatively, simply turn off your computer and store your phone. As easy as that.
4. Refuse to let them enter your life.
Despite bringing their hostility to light, nothing appears to have changed. It might be time to take action to ensure that those Negative Nancies never show up in your feeds again. You can turn off the notifications for your mother and best friend, even though you might not be able to turn them off in person. Alternatively, just put your phone away and turn off your computer. That’s as simple as that.
4. Refuse to let them enter your life.
If things haven’t gotten better by now, you might want to consider splitting up, even though it sounds dramatic. (Or, at the absolute least, don’t invite them to significant events like Thanksgiving or birthday parties.) Pham said that you do not have to keep them in your life, regardless of your relationship with them. Relationships change and grow over time for both positive and negative reasons, regardless of the reason. If someone is detracting from rather than adding to your life, make an effort to get away from them.
5. Stop bringing them up.
Now that you’ve taken a chance and eliminated some negativity from your life, the next step is entirely up to you. You must stop bringing them up. It’s not as simple as it seems, especially if this disagreeable person has become a part of your life. However, according to Dr. Karuna Sabnani for the Huffington Post, “you are trying to set a new pattern,” which means forgetting about all the effects they’ve had on you. It’s time to move on and begin interacting with good people.
6. Remove any unfavorable connotations
Negativity can create drama that can be likened to an addiction. It can be something you hate and the way it makes you feel, but it could come back so easily into your mind. So, if you’ve made the decision to cut a negative person out of your life, go one step further and get rid of anything that might remind you of them. Dr. Sabnani suggested not to read this person’s prior emails and texts. Click Delete if you can’t resist. Engage in healthful pursuits during your leisure time to fill the void.
